The Art of the Phone/Text Conversation
One thing my parents can’t seem to wrap their heads around is why people are texting more than they are talking on the phone. I’m not even sure how to explain this conundrum myself either. Even my father who is as old school as they come has succumbed to texting me instead of calling me because the success rate of getting a response from me is much higher.
In the scary world of dating, most plans and hook ups are done through texting. I use to think that I appreciated being able to communicate through texts. I could take my time reading it, deciphering it, agonizing over it, asking second opinions about it and take a even sweeter ass time compiling an equally witty text. Mind you, there are of course rules to texting your dates. You have to be wary of how long you take to text them, the length of your texts in comparison to theirs and making sure to leave it open ended.
I had met a guy at a bar one night four months ago, numbers were exchanged and the texting began. We had a really good vibe going on, our texts were funny, witty and engaging. His weren’t just the two liners I usually receive but were ten lines, something unheard of! We bantered back and forth and finally managed to go on a date three weeks later. The date went well and there was definitely chemistry. The next day, I got the follow up text about how he had a wonderful time and I was all giddy inside. We continued our texting relationship but eventually dwindling down to one text a day but they were still long and meaningful ones. Our texts would flirt along the skirts of the idea of the second date but do you want to guess when that took place? Two months later! Has texting a novel to each other hindered his ability to simply just ask a girl out on a date? I have to rule out that he wasn’t interested because what kind of guy would spend so much time coming up with a long text to a girl if he wasn’t? We continued texting after but I started to resent it and kept putting it off because without engaging in real life, it felt so pointless. Needless to say, I had to sever that relationship.
Lately, I’ve been talking to a, how should I put it… a special friend which I also met at a bar. I was hesitant at first on going on a date with him but his insistence wore me down. He did start off with the texting but the day before our scheduled date, he called me. The ringing of my phone is usually only reserved for my mother. I answered it with uncertainty. At first, I thought he just wanted to confirm our date but instead he wanted to ask me how my day was and what I do. I was thoroughly impressed that at this day and age of texting, he wanted to call me and have a real conversation with me instead of hiding behind his screen. The weirder thing is, he has continued to insist we talk on the phone. After years of texting, I am now stumped in this art of the phone conversation. No longer do I have the sweet luxury of time on my side where I can collect my thoughts and put together a clever text. I had to be on the ball! I even find myself coming up with conversation topics throughout the day. Not to worry though, I’m confident I can dig through my past to the days before texting became a norm for the dating game and uncover those phone conversation skills again. This bit of old fashion-ness feels like a breath of fresh air for me and I will happily welcome that in my life.
Gentlemen, next time you’re thinking of texting your lady, dial her number instead.
top: h&m / skirt: french connection / stockings: unknown / shoes: nine west / necklace: primark / bag: ywl / watch :michael kors / bracelets: gorjana, j crew, stella&dot, diy, house of harlow, hk market / rings: house of harlow, marc by marc jacobs, primark, durumi